


To Pun or not to pun... It's not a question because Iggy can't do it when he's drunk.

by Lady_Kaie



Series: Igtober 2020 [6]
Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Bad Puns, Drunken Flirting, Drunken Shenanigans, Drunkenness, F/M, Gen, Groping, Humor, Implied/Referenced Sex, Married Couple, Married Life, Naked Male Clothed Female, Other, Puns & Word Play, Sexual Humor, drunkiggy, sillyignis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-06
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:34:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26859043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Kaie/pseuds/Lady_Kaie
Summary: You come home from a long day and find out that you aren't alone at home.  In fact... you have a husband waiting and ready for you!
Relationships: Ignis Scientia/Reader, Prompto Argentum/Noctis Lucis Caelum
Series: Igtober 2020 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1948411
Kudos: 18





	To Pun or not to pun... It's not a question because Iggy can't do it when he's drunk.

**Author's Note:**

> Igtober 2020: Prompt 6: Pun
> 
> I tried you guys! I'm not so great at puns! But I tried!

Life before the darkness had been hectic and a little far too predictable. People went to work, watched the news for the latest events between Lucis and Niflheim, spent time with their families, indulged in little pointless fights and then went to sleep so that it could be done all over again the next day. Naturally that life changed when NIflheim took possession of the Crown City and her citizen’s realized that the world was no longer safe. The predictability of life was non existent and wouldn’t have a touch of that blessed normalcy until ten years had passed and the True King returned light to the world.

And he had. They had.

The three dedicated men who had seen him through his journey to the point of darkness and then returned him to his throne, never once faltered in their appointed task and now all of Eos could thank them. The rebuilding of Insomnia was a lifetime event that would see the passage of many generations, but the pride everyone felt as they journeyed back home was unmistakable. This was history in the making…

And it was a point of pride to be part of it.

Almost seven years out of the darkness with a family and loved ones always near, you have felt that emotion on several occasions. Then on other occasions you simply feel exhaustion. Whoever said rebuilding would be easy and a blessed thing had never actually done it before! But it is all anyone had been dreaming of when the daemons ruled Eos, and despite feeling cranky about long hours right now while children grew and went on to apprentice for life long skills that were lost by many while technology reigned, now they are necessary once more.

Seven years you have taught and guided the next generation toward the path that will see the Crown City regain her glory, but these nights, where you prepare for the end of a year and to say goodbye to children who are now young women and men, is always hard. Within a week they will be celebrated by the town and sent out to build their own lives…

Their own families.

Sighing as your key slides in the door, you push the heavy structure open and step inside the spacious foyer. One year has passed since you moved into the new house, your daughter nearing four and another being planned, there are times you still miss that small duplex on the other side of the citadel grounds. Unfortunately it was getting too small for your growing family and Ravus had gotten it in his head to take on a project of building homes in a Tenebraean style that would reflect his culture and was slowly spreading it’s way through Insomnia. The mix of both styles just solidified the knowledge that much more concretely in the minds of the survivors that Lucis was host to more than just her former residents, but now, all parts of Eos. She was a Kingdom for the people of the star.

But now was not the time for such thoughts so you shut them away and focused on the here and now. The scent of candles and dried petals that you had begun to collect from the many wildflowers your daughter picked you that summer, hits you first and then you open your eyes and close the door. It’s dark save for a small point of light just at the top of the staircase where a small balcony overlooks the open concept living room and kitchen, behind two double glass paned doors. That’s your little haven where you are positive you can see a body moving around.

That’s strange? Ignis was supposed to be out with his friends…

Your daughter is staying at the citadel for her weekly sleepover with her Uncle Prompto, which you are desperately happy about! Ever since she was three, Prompto started their weekly movie nights, where the two of them watch disney films, eat popcorn and then change into their chocobo pajamas, his yellow and hers a beautiful heather grey, before they go to bed after reading a few stories. 

Well she goes to bed. PRompto usually plays some video games with Noctis once he’s home and then they go to bed. The next morning he brings the little one to the tea shop and the entire group has a nice brunch all together.

This Friday, the plan had been for the guys to stay out drinking for a bit after a very long and intensive week working with Duscae and Cleigne officials in charting out a plan for food exchanges during the winter. With the help of the Duscae farmers, numerous abandoned buildings that had not been damaged in the fall were used now for greenhouses that the farmers had helped set up with mountains of rich soil and the necessary structures that would stand the test of winter and time.

Four large office buildings had been converted in the eastern sector where most commercial businesses and offices for the city were kept during the years of booming business. Now they were used for farming and were equipped with plenty of u.v. lighting that kept plants growing all year round. What was grown inside was more than enough for the citizens, with a healthy amount moved into trading considering that the hunting grounds weren’t as abundant as they had been now that the herds were all jumbled up from fleeing to safer locations during the darkness.

Either way, after a few months of listening to the negotiations in school, private time, and especially at home when Ignis needed to vent about the lack of professionalism by certain individual’s, there was no way you were going to think about all of that right now! If you had to you would be a vegetarian for the next four months or at the very least subsist on dried meats and the frozen supplies at the butcher’s that were served out as rations when the time called for such measures.

Thankfully you lived with a chef, and there was always the tea shop, where you spent a significant amount of meals at anyway. Restaurants were always well cared for amongst the citizens. But again…

This was not the time to be contemplating potential food problems when it was never much of a concern anyway. Right now you wanted to get out of your work clothes and into a much deserved bath.

Slipping your shoes off at the door and setting your briefcase beside Ignis’ in the entryway closet, you head straight up the slightly curved staircase, bypass the doorway that will lead you to the other three bedrooms and gathering room that are located on the top floor and quickly arrive at your bedroom doors. The balcony is empty which has been bothering you but you just haven’t been able to come up with the right furniture to put there. Again, a problem for you at a later date, not this moment in time. With a sigh of resignation you tug open the doors and come face to face with a very welcome sight.

“Why… Hellooooo Dahhling…” Ignis cooed with a slight slur in his tone as he sat propped on the bed, one long gorgeous leg crossed over the other with his hands spread invitingly out at his sides while they caressed the silk comforter beneath them.

Intrigued piqued, as well as another piece of your brain, you quietly shut the doors and drink in the gorgeous body sitting in front of you. There isn’t a single stitch of clothing on this handsome man save for his gloves, which means that his scars and perfectly chiseled musculature are very much on display for you to all but devour. And devour it you do.

How long has it been? Two? Three weeks? Either way, too many weeks too long in your opinion as your fatigue takes a back seat to down right lust. “Hello Iggy.” There’s no hiding your interest and why should you?

Romance can be given on another day, but for right now you just want to be beneath him screaming out to the ceiling with wild abandon. One of his gorgeous brows shoot up as he all but breathes in your mood and then he’s climbing up onto those gorgeous long legs and sauntering over to your prone form with a sway that comes from just a little too much alcohol.

The moment he is up against you with a hit of whisky on his breath to fan out over your face, he leans in and cups your cheeks only to hold them still and kiss you breathless. You all but melt on contact and purr against him when he withdraws. “Are you pleased with my attire... “ He taunts with a wicked grin as his finger tips tickle your cheeks.

The Gods know you are! Silly man! But there is something that distracts your non hazy mind. One glove feels different from the other and when you take them in hand to chance a peak at the sleekly stitched decorations, you chuckle. He has two different gloves on. “Your attire is just fine… but did you know you have a driving glove and a work glove on?” His silver driving gloves with the thumb missing, which he wore whenever he went traveling though he did not drive, and the other a full black leather one that he wore to protect his hands from any minute accident that could happen. The most frequent being paper cuts.

Ignis seems slightly disappointed in himself before the inebriation stifles it and he is grinning sloppily all over again. Hair in disarray down his incredible face, you grin and meet his lips for another consuming kiss and all but groan when he slides those gloves under your shirt. “You weren’t going to bring work home on me now were you?”

“The only work I have planned is on you… to work… over with… your body…” He lets out a giggle and you can’t stop yourself from chiming in. “I mean… you are my only work of body tonight…” Another laugh and now you know what he meant. That you are his only ‘body of work’ that he has planned for tonight.

Setting your eloquent husband, who is the pun master extraordinaire, up for another, you take the hand with his driving glove and nip the pad of his exposed thumb. “And this? Plan on driving me somewhere tonight?”

Another saucy grin and then a current of lazy words that wrap around your senses and stroke. At least that's the goal. “Just to drive you senselessly into … craziness…” Ignis frowns as you laugh again and slips his hands straight into your pants that he unbuttoned somewhere during this bout of playfulness and squeezes your bottom. The bubbling fit of laughter is immediately cut off as he jerks you firmly against his very ready point of interest. You feel your eyes all but roll back into your head. “Darling I really am far too drunk for puns or jokes tonight. Can we just make love now?” He’s rubbing against you like a cat in heat and you don’t need any other preparation but that mouth on yours.

Breathless before delving back into his lips and tongue you whisper, “As long as you keep the gloves on.”

Ignis nips your lobe and whispers wickedly. “The only thing I planned to get off tonight was you.”

He can’t see it, but your eyes are sparkling as you shout in triumph, “You did it Iggy!” To which he merely chuckles that deep glorious sound that makes your inner walls clench. Another languid kiss is delivered and then up over his shoulder you go where you immediately are greeted by a very muscled, handsome behind. Giving him a swat, and a light love bite on his cheek, he delivers his own swat and tosses you to the bed.

Pun or no pun… Ignis’ silver tongue full of sass may not have been working to its full potential tonight but the one that never fails to drive you to insanity certainly was. 

He put in a lot overtime…

Shifted himself into gear…

Got your engine all revved up…

Enjoyed the speech you had to deliver…

Ignis went on for nearly an hour the next morning while you got ready for brunch, on all of the missed opportunities he had been too drunk to enjoy. 

One could say he had worked hard on these all night…


End file.
